Five Times Sakurakoji Almost Confessed
by peroxidepest17
Summary: Full title: Five Times Sakurakoji Almost Confessed And One Time He Did


**Title:** Five Times Sakurakoji Almost Confessed (And One Time He Did)  
**Universe:** My Boss, My Hero  
**Theme/Topic:** As stated above  
**Rating:** PG-13  
**Character/Pairing/s: **JunxHikari, MakioxJun (mentions MakioxHikari)  
**Warnings/Spoilers:** Slight spoilers for the end of the series? Also, crack and stupid.   
**Word Count:** 1,877  
**Summary:** The road to becoming an adult is a hard one.  
**Dedication:** absenceofmind's request for the "5 things" meme on my journal.  
**A/N:** WELL. This is a little bit weird in terms of how my MBMH fics _usually_ go. But then again this whole speed-writing thing might be bad for my health or something, I don't know. I AM A MACHINE THIS WEEKEND THOUGH. Aren't you proud of me? LOLZ Right. I guess I should let you decide that after you read the story.  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, though I wish constantly.  
**Distribution:** Just lemme know.

* * *

**1. **

Jun almost confesses in the spring of their first year in high school, because high school is when you start turning into an adult and feelings like liking someone or loving someone are natural and thus nothing to be laughed about no matter how close a friend to a person you are. Knowing this gives him confidence, makes his palms less sweaty and his breaths more even when he sees Hikari. He's ready to stop being the kid she used to play with when they were small; it's his first year in high school, his first steps towards growing up.

Except in their first year of high school all of their senpai think Hikari-chan is cute as well, and always invite her out to karaoke or to get burgers even though she can't go with them. These senpai are all soccer players and basketball players and when Jun stands next to them he feels inexplicably small and inconspicuous (it doesn't help that he's already short for his own age as well). Even worse, it makes him feel painfully, awkwardly _young._

So in the end he holds off for the first year and watches Hikari make friends with those older boys who think she's cute; he tells himself next year or the year after that they'll all be gone and he'll be taller and stronger too—grown up enough that she'll stop introducing him to other people as her childhood friend. He tells himself that next year, he'll be ready, and does everything he can to prepare to turn into a respectable adult whose feelings can be taken seriously.

**2.**

In their second year of high school he gets closer to confessing than the year before; he asks her to eat lunch with him under one of the big oak trees all along St. Agnes's lawn because he knows she likes that kind of stuff.

He's there early and waiting for her; he's rehearsed exactly what he's going to say to her for a year already.

When he sees her she smiles and waves at him from across the lawn, he smiles back but before he can wave she's intercepted by an excited Hagiwara, who grabs her wrist and pulls her aside.

Hikari manages to make a "_wait a moment_" gesture over her shoulder to him before she is dragged away.

Twenty minutes later and the lunch hour is almost gone; just when Jun has given up for today Hikari comes jogging up to him, out of breath and apologetic.

"Jun-kun! I'm sorry," she huffs, and flomps down onto the grass next to him.

"It's fine," he lies, and tries to begin working his courage up again. His heart feels like all this starting and stalling will be the death of him and he's only sixteen.

She doesn't notice how anxious he is and smiles at him lopsidedly, "Ah, I just got confessed to," she tells him, and lies back on the grass.

His mouth goes dry.

"W-what did you say?" he manages, with admirable calm.

She sighs. "I rejected senpai."

He's glad she can't see the relief evident on his face; she's too busy staring up into the canopy of leaves above them.

"Because right now I can't date anyone," she adds, sounding wistful. "I don't have time right now."

Jun wonders if this is what being heartbroken feels like.

"Because of the situation at home," he murmurs, more to himself than her.

She nods. "It sucks, doesn't it?" she laughs, and then sits up again. "Lunch is almost over, do you still want to eat together?"

"Would you have said yes?" he asks her, suddenly. Because he needs to know. "If you had time, and you didn't have to take care of your brothers and sisters. Would you have said yes?"

She blinks; thinks about it for a moment or two. "Yeah," she admits, "I think I would have." She smiles. "Senpai is really nice!"

Jun nods and stands.

"I already ate," he tells her, and then goes back inside.

He thinks to himself that maybe it's time to give up.

**3.**

Makki is the one who gives Jun the courage he needs to try again in his third year; Makki who is stupid and honest and chases after every bit of his life and his youth with all the power he has.

Makki who is brave and loud and loves high school life more than anyone else. Looking at Makki try so hard at everything like this makes Jun feel like a coward for giving up. Seeing how Makki win's Hikari's heart makes Jun feel like a failure.

This is the kind of person Hikari likes, Jun realizes, when he sees the way she looks at his best friend. Jun realizes that even if he doesn't act like it, maybe Makki is the most grown up of them all.

When Makki rejects Hikari not long afterwards, Jun decides to go and meet her. He feels like someone who needs to get something very important off his chest.

"Do you want to go out with me?" he asks her, around the lingering taste of pudding that is far too sweet for him. He looks her in the eye when he says this even though he already knows what the answer will be; he feels like it's finally here, his first real step into adulthood.

She smiles and shakes her head just like he knows she will. "I'm sorry," she says, and stands and leaves.

Jun watches her go, closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He tells himself that even if it hurts, it's just like Makki says.

These are the important memories of their youths.

**4.**

When Jun discovers he likes someone again some years later it is strange and unexpected, far different from the nervous blossoms of first love he had felt back in high school but no less nerve-wracking or wonderful.

He almost wants to confess out loud right here and right now when he realizes it, but looking at all the strange and unfamiliar faces sitting around him at the moment, he manages to swallow it for the time being and act like a grown up. Because that's what he is now; an adult.

"Oi, what's the matter?" Makio growls in his direction when he sees the look on Jun's face. In the meantime, the girls twitter and flirt and offer food all around them as the club's music pounds in their ears and the lights burn brilliant colors into their eyes. "It's your 20th birthday," Makio reminds him crossly. "The girls all think you're cute, booze is paid for, food's first class. Least you could do is smile like ya mean it."

Makio is trying to be intimidating when he says this but only comes across as sulky to Jun; perhaps he is put out because Jun doesn't look like he's having the time of his life at the big "coming of age" bash Makio had so painstakingly put together for him.

Jun can't help it when he thinks like this; he smiles at his friend, large and genuine. "Thank you, Makki," he says, and means every word of it.

The girls see the look on his face as he says this and twitter knowingly to one another.

Makio just grunts and quickly looks away from Jun. "Yeah, well."

He orders more booze.

**5.**

Jun almost confesses again later that night, but when he goes to sit next to Makki once the girls are gone and the music has stopped and the lights are being turned off one by one, Makki's cell phone suddenly rings. Everyone still inside the club suddenly goes dead quiet.

Makio just listens at first, nods every few seconds.

"We'll be right there," Makio eventually says in a low voice, and stands. He flips his phone closed and pulls his hair back; he ties it up and as he does, the look on his face is like one of those samurai in the old period dramas Jun sometimes watches with his sister. Less than a minute later all of the Sharp Fang that had also been at the party are in two perfect lines on either side of Makio; they're not drunk or laughing anymore because suddenly they're top-notch Yakuza again.

"Sorry," Makio manages to say to Jun before he turns on his heel and heads for the door, "Business."

Jun nods silently at Makio's back and wants to say, "I like you!" to his friend at the top of his lungs, just in case.

As Makio leaves, Jun manages to shout, "Be careful!" after him instead.

**6.**

The call comes from Kuroi at close to five am; it's fine because Jun hadn't been able to sleep anyway.

By the time he dashes outside—still in his pajamas—there's a black car already waiting for him in the driveway. He doesn't wait for the driver to open the door for him, Jun jumps in and before he knows it he is on his way to Makio's house.

When he gets there everyone is grim-faced and silent; Jun's heart stops in his chest as Kazu and Kuroi wordlessly clear a path for him to Makio's room.

Jun throws open the door without knocking; Makio, Mikio, Sakaki niidaime, and the house physician all look up to find a panting twenty-year old college student standing in the room wearing blue and white checked pajama pants and an oversized Waseda University sweater.

Mikio is the first to recover; he laughs at the look of sheer terror on Jun's face. "Poor Jun-kun. Kazu-kun and Kuroi-san are such worry worts," Mikio chuckles to himself.

"Uh," Makio's father grunts, and then nods at the doctor seeing to Makio's stab wound. "Right, we should go." Quietly, they stand and leave the room.

Jun doesn't see or hear any of them; he's too busy looking at the blood covered gauze in the pan Mikio is holding, the fresh white bandages wrapped around Makki's waist.

"Makki…" he manages, and takes two steps forward.

Makio looks embarrassed, maybe for his carelessness at being stabbed, maybe for the way Jun is looking at him. "Just a scratch," he assures the younger man gruffly.

Jun's relief is strong enough to send him to the floor; he plops down right there in the middle of the room at Makki's feet and feels very slightly lightheaded.

He wants to shout, "You can't do things like this because I like you!" at the top of his lungs right now, and maybe even hit Makki a few times, but he suddenly realizes that he doesn't have the energy to do much of anything right now.

So instead he hugs his knees to his chest and says, quietly, "Idiot, didn't I tell you to be careful?"

"Don't tell me how to do my job," Makio grunts in response.

His harsh words are only quashed by the fact that he has reached out and is petting Jun's hair; he does it awkwardly but gently and can't look Jun in the eye the entire time.

Jun can only laugh incredulously to himself as he relaxes under Makio's hand; he tells himself that he'll confess tomorrow over breakfast, even though he kind of suspects that Makio knows how he feels already anyway.

**END**


End file.
